Chanukah

Forget Christmas, I want Chanukah

Here are my reasons

1) Christmas: 1 day. Chanukah: 8 days! By the sheer numerical statistics it's better

2) Latkas are better than turkey and green beans

3) During Chanukah in Israel, you get sufganiyot

Look at how happy Blaise David is. His face alone is a case for Chanukah

But finally, the reason Chanukah beats Christmas is because it's not based on a story of a false messiah, and wrapped up in a modern story about a fat man in a red suit.